Category Archives: Humor

Seven Systems Europeans Use That Make More Sense

With World Cup fever heating up, I find myself torn between my two favorite teams – America and Italia.  Thankfully, the teams are not in the same group and so I can root for both squads guilt-free (hopefully all the way to the finals).  As I was comparing and contrasting the strengths and weaknesses of both teams; it occurred to me that perhaps I had stumbled onto something much more important.  I realized that it might be fun to compare America vs. Europe… not just the ability to move the soccer ball around the field, but “bigger picture” things.  What common sense things do Europeans do that Americans fail to recognize?IMAGE

For the purposes of this first post, I will focus solely on the items that appear in the “win” column for Europe.  I will follow-up a little later with another post listing America’s “wins”.  It seemed only fair to publish the posts in this order since Italy logged their first World Cup win before America.

Some background… OK, this piece is not a serious look at which place is “better”.  I’m not weighing in on art & architecture, natural beauty or economic importance.  I’m not comparing the food or the people.  I’m only noting a few of the systems in place that perhaps we would do well to share with one another.  Without further adieu…

1.) Use of the Metric System

Let’s start with an obvious one.  With Europe (and most of the civilized world) using the metric system… it only seems to make sense that America should join the party.  Of course, why should we use such a simple and common-sense system?!  We are ‘merica after all. Land of the free and home of the brave (and sometimes home of the confusing).  Sure… let’s not make 1,000,000 mg = 1,000 grams = 1 kg when we could make 2.2 lbs = 35 oz.  I see the logic there!  There’s a reason that drug dealers have adopted the metric system, people!yNAsr hipster-america-and-the-metric-system because_merica_thats_why_us_flag_poster_large-raad8f53405bb4542ae098d89e2fe581f_8ep1d_8byvr_324

2.) Put Your Pocket Calculator Away

When you’re dining in a restaurant in America, you’ll need to do some mental math when the bill arrives.  Ask yourself if the service was mediocre or exceptional.  Then establish a figure in the range of 15% – 25% that you desire to leave the server.  Do you want to tip on top of the tax and alcohol or remove that portion before you establish a fair gratuity?  Finally, do the math and triple check it – someone’s livelihood depends on your generosity.  In Europe, it’s a bit simpler.  If your bill is €46 – you can leave a €50 and be finished.  Here in northern Italy, tipping even that small amount is the exception, not the rule.  Waiters are paid fair wages and so it’s not necessary to subsidize their income.  I understand the concept of tipping (I worked as a server all through college) but I do often resent paying an extra 20% to the surly server who forgot my ketchup, out of some sense of social obligation or guilt.tip-jar-resize

Boy... that adds up!
Boy… that adds up!

3.) No More Banged Up Shins

It took me some time to get used to the placement of light switches here, but now I’m a full convert to the European system.  In America, the light switch is on the inside of the room, usually next to the door (but not always).  If you’re walking into your own home, it’s no problem.  But if you are entering a foreign space under the cover of darkness, you may hear a “shreeek” from the cat whose tail you just crushed.   In Europe, you don’t have to worry about banging your shins or stepping on Garfield.  The light switches are on the outside of the room.  Simply illuminate your path and… go!

Avoid this by turning on the lights first
Avoid this by turning on the lights first

4.) Operate With Military Efficiency

You’ve never heard a Lieutenant in the Army bark, “get to the mess hall at 6:00… PM”.  They say, “18:00″.  So why does the rest of the American population divide a 24 hour day in half?  I suppose it has something to do with the design of a 12 hour clock, but I do see value in using the 24 hour system.  Admittedly, it takes some getting used to.  After a little while I realized that when Jen asked what time our favorite shows came, I was responding, “21:00″ (9:00pm) in line with the television guide I was consulting.

“I meant clean the latrine by 10:00am… not 10:00pm!”

5.) Baby, it’s Cold Outside

OK, I realize that this is very similar to the first point about the metric system… but some of these things just make sense.  Freezing starts at 0°?  Nah… let’s make it… say, 32º.  Yeah, that seems about right.Fun with Celsius

6.) Eat With Razor Sharp Efficiency

Pick up your fork in your left hand and knife in the right, keeping your fork tongs down.  Cut a piece of meat.  Set your knife down on the plate.  Reverse your fork from your left hand to your right, twisting the tongs up.  Stab your piece of meat once again and put it in your mouth.  Repeat.  Clearly, you’re eating in America (I’m also guessing it’s a 2-3 lb steak).  Here in Europe, this process is altered as follows: pick up your fork and knife keeping the fork tongs down. Cut your meat.  With the piece of meat you just cut on the fork, simply move it directly into your mouth with the tongs still down.  No extra puncturing the meat.  No setting utensils down.  No reversal of hands.  Simply enjoy your food.  Just imagine how many precious seconds of your life you could have been spared if you had been doing this your whole life!

"That American system is far too confusing.  I'll just eat like this!"
“That American system is far too confusing. I’ll just eat like this!”

7.) I’ll Be Getting Off On First Floor

If you’re visiting an office on the first floor of a building in America, then you’ll need to ascend to the second level of the edifice, according to the elevator.  So when you ascend one floor from the lobby… you’re on the second level.  Hmm?  So, in America, we really “start” on the 2nd floor.  OK.  I guess.  What if that office is on the sixteenth floor?  Well, then you’ll need to go fourteen levels above the ground, since we don’t “have” a thirteenth floor in most of our buildings.  Wow.  Now I’m lost.  Here in Europe, they keep it simple.  The lobby is 0 and the first floor is… the first floor.

This is so much easier
This is so much easier

These are just a few of the things that seem to make more sense.  Maybe when I move back to America I can start a national trend to change these seven items to the European way of doing things.Sipping Espresso Logo

If you liked this post, check out my lists of observations about more differences between Italy and America.

ALL THINGS ARE A LITTLE DIFFERENT

Part One (January 23, 2013)

Part Two (March 26, 2013)

Part Three (June 19, 2013)

Part Four (March 26, 2014)

Mercatone dell’Antiquariato – Milan’s Outdoor Antique Market

Jennifer and I simply love outdoor markets.  Jen holds on to the belief that she’s going to stumble across a vintage Louis Vuitton handbag or uncover that perfect piece for our future living room.  I’ve got much lower (and more realistic expectations); I’m just thrilled that I get to eat “street food”.  Nothing is better than a porchetta paninio (pork sandwich) from a food vendor with freshly fried zeppole  (Italian donuts) for dessert.  I love sandwiches, I love eating outside and I love feeding my entire family for less than €20!

Pack your bags, let's check out the market!
Pack your bags, let’s check out the market!
All of us at the Fiera
All of us at the Mercatone dell’Antiquariato

Jen has been trying to get to the Mercatone dell’Antiquariato del Naviglio Grande since we moved here nearly a year and a half ago. “What’s the big deal – why is it so hard to make it to a market”, you ask? Well, this particular market only takes place on the last Sunday of each month (except for July).  For those of you that aren’t math wizards, that’s just eleven chances a year to make it to Milan for this 80-year-old Milanese tradition.  Our first attempt was foiled – we set out one day in January of 2013, but got derailed when we couldn’t find parking.  It was ambitious of me to try so soon after moving to Italy – had I known then what I know now, I would have just thrown my car on the curb like the hundreds of other locals.  Instead, we stopped for lunch and found an amazing sandwich place, which I blogged about HERE.  After lunch, we lost the motivation to go back and agreed, “we’ll try again as soon as we get the next opportunity”.  Well, travel and other obligations delayed that opportunity fifteen more months.

Jen's sister Jessica along with Jen and Julia
Jen’s sister Jessica along with Jen and Julia
Matt and Jessica
Matt and Jessica
Another family photo along the
Another family photo along the Alzaia Naviglio Grande

We had been casually referring to the market as “Milan’s Antique Market”.  Certainly, there is some truth in referring to the Mercatone dell’Antiquariato as an antique market, but perhaps flea market is a more apt description.  The products sold range from old shoes to mid-century furniture.  You can acquisition antique coffee makers or art by local artists.  The best part about paying a visit to this unique bazaar is that you’ll never know what you need until you find it.

Tables full of treasure
Tables full of treasure
Some old photography equipment
Some old photography equipment
Loved this old record player
Loved this old record player
Just in case you need some new frames
Just in case you need some new frames
The stores also sell antiques - here is a classic espresso maker once used in a coffee bar
The stores also sell antiques – here is a classic espresso maker once used in a coffee bar

Roughly 380 vendors wind their way up Alzaia Naviglio Grande, placing their backs to the canal.  This trendy neighborhood in Milan features many cafes and bars that call to the younger, artistic crowd. Jen and I had been hoping to get away from the centro (center) of Milan and visit this particular area for some time.  Well, two birds… as they say. As lunch time approached, we picked a great pizzeria in a former factory – the space was as great as the food.  If you find yourself in Milan near the last weekend of the month, be sure to carve out some time for the Mercatone dell’Antiquariato.

Vendors display along the canal
Vendors display along the canal
The neighborhood is full of artists
The neighborhood is full of artists and street art

INFORMATION

WHAT »    Mercatone dell’Antiquariato del Naviglio Grande
WHEN »   Last Sunday of every month (except July)
WHERE » Milan
ADDRESS »
Strada Alzaia Naviglio Grande, via Valenza, South
TRANSPORT »
Metro Porta Genova/bus 59, 74, 169
Tram 2, 3, 9, 14, 15, 29, 30Sipping Espresso Logo

You “Massa” Check Out This City (Massa, Italy)

Man, do I love the bad puns in my titles or what?  Probably about as much as I love posing rhetorical questions to my readers…hercules__bad_puns_by_masterof4elements-d75obi2

Roughly twelve days ago, I was as proud of myself as Arvind Mahankali when he successfully spelled knaidel to beat Pranav Sivakumar and secure the championship title during the 86th Scripps National Spelling Bee (apparently, this particular Indian-American knows a thing or two about Jewish comfort food).  Why was I so pleased with myself, you ask?  Well, I thought that I had finally caught up with our stories on the blog.  And then a whirlwind of activity commenced in a flash as Jen’s sister arrived for a visit with her boyfriend.  We had such a nice time traveling and eating with them (really, is there anything else you would want to do in Italy?) that now I have a ton more to write about.  Additionally, we left them to their own devices while we embarked on a rewarding road-trip, which I cannot wait to tell you about.  So, now once again –  I am behind the times again faster than you can spell prosciutto.

An accurate portrayal of me as I struggle to keep up with the blog
An accurate portrayal of me as I struggle to keep up with the blog

When I was looking ahead toward the next 5-8 posts, I realized that I would be remiss not to step back and mention our visits to Pisa and then Massa in northern Tuscany.  When I last wrote, I detailed our trip to Lucca (HERE).  During the drive home we detoured to marvel at the Torre pendente di Pisa (Leaning Tower of Pisa) before getting back on the road.  We hadn’t traveled too much further when our perfectly timed Italian stomachs told us it was time for lunch (at first I thought our three stomachs growling in unison was a tractor-trailer honking furiously at me).  I was more in the mood for a leisurely lunch than a quick stop at an AutoGrill (picture a rest-stop along the NJ Turnpike with better food and espresso).  I turned to my trusty “TripAdvisor” cell phone app and searched for a restaurant near us.  I discovered Il Fatty (yeah… you guessed the translation; The Fatty) in the city we were approaching.  With a name like, “the fatty” – how could you go wrong?!  I took the exit toward Massa and headed into the center of town.

Leaning Tower of Pisa
Torre pendente di Pisa – Leaning Tower of Pisa
Julia strikes a pose
Julia strikes a pose
Work on the tower began in 1173 and took 199 years to complete
Work on the tower began in 1173 and took 199 years to complete
Julia photographs me in front of the tower
Julia photographs me in front of the tower
Battistero di San Giovanni (Pisa Baptistry) and Primatial (Pisa Cathedral)
Battistero di San Giovanni (Pisa Baptistry) and Primatial (Pisa Cathedral)

You may not have heard of Massa (we hadn’t), but if you’re a fan of interior design, than you’ve definitely heard of the province in which Massa is located, Carrara.  Carrara marble is the fashionable stone of choice for kitchens counters the world over.  The stone has been mined in this area for centuries (Carrara marble has been used since Ancient Rome).  Upon exiting the highway, my mind was set only on lunch with no expectation of discovering any real beauty; the area is heavily industrialized.  Like a naval shipyard or factory park, the landscape is blanketed with large machinery, billowing factories and tractor trailers transporting thousands of pounds worth of the white stone.

Panorama Massa Italy
Massa and Carrara are sister cities in the Province of Carrara

However, we were surprised when we got away from the mining equipment and approached the center of town.  The city itself was clean and beautiful.  It became obvious that Massa has prospered as a result of the local product.  The town is well designed and perfectly maintained.  Even the street curbs and park benches are made of Carrara marble!  After a delicious lunch at Il Fatty we wanted to discover what the city had to offer.  There seemed to be a surprise around every turn.  We found orange trees and large piazze (town squares)ancient buildings and ample shopping.  We were pleasantly surprised to see how much is available to tourists, although the place is happily devoid of the map-reading, fanny-pack wearing, crowd-shoving sightseers (by the way, I’m not casting stones; that is usually us in a nutshell, less the fanny-pack).

The
Il Fatty’s “signature” sandwich – Panino Lamprodotto
Panino salsiccia e rapini
Panino salsiccia e rapini
Homemade torta di riso, proudly made by the owner's son, Alessandro
Homemade torta di riso, proudly made by the owner’s son, Alessandro
The interior piazza
The interior piazza
Some of the colorful buildings of Massa
Some of the colorful buildings of Massa
Great statue in the center of the main piazza
Great statue in the center of the main piazza
Government building in the main piazza
Government building in the main piazza
There were orange trees everywhere
There were orange trees everywhere

There is even a wonderful 15th century castle perched high above the town.  We took the narrow and windy drive up the hill, only to discover the castle was closed for repair.  Oh well, I was able to get a couple beautiful panoramic’s of the city and neighboring sea.

Massa on the road to Malaspina Castle
Massa on the road to Malaspina Castle
View of Massa from above
View of Massa from above
The position of the city is well situated between the coast and the mountains
The position of the city is well situated between the coast and the mountains

If I can borrow a page from the Michelin Star guide-book, I would rank Massa with a full star (out of three).  One star denotes a very nice place worthy of a visit (but not a place to go far out of your way to see).  If you do visit, tell Alessandro at Il Fatty that we said hello. However, be weary of his suggestion to try the local favorite, Panino Lamprodotto.  It’s basically just tripe (cows stomach) on a bun – not my favorite Italian food.  Of course, I would be lying if I told you I left a single bite behind.

“Lucca Over Here… This Tuscan Town is Amazing”!

If you read the title of this post with your best impression of an Italian accent, then you probably nailed the pronunciation of one of our new favorite Italian towns.  Lucca has been on our bucket list to visit for quite some time and now we can happily say we’ve been.

Lucca, Italy
Lucca, Italy viewed from the Torre Guinigi
Torre Guinigi - Lucca
Another angle from Torre Guinigi
Lucca viewed from the city walls
Lucca viewed from the city walls

The city is renowned for many things, not the least of which is the giant annual gathering of comic book nerds and fantasy film geeks. Lucca plays host to Europe’s version of Comic-Con, the Fiera Internazionale del Fumetto (International Festival of Comics) or as it’s commonly referred – Lucca Comics and Games.
lucca_comics_and_games_2013-questione-di-stile

Some participants of Lucca Comics.  Photo courtesy of Francesco Petrucci
Some participants of Lucca Comics and Games. Photo courtesy of Francesco Petrucci

For those of us that don’t have any desire to put on a Superman costume (yes, I’m just enough of a geek to know the term cosplay), there is more than enough to do in Lucca, which I will detail below.  Thanks very much to some free press bestowed on me by Italia Living, I have recently picked up a few new readers (benvenuto a Sipping Espresso)  and so I’m going to treat this post a little differently than in the past. As opposed to running through our little vacation part by part, instead I will opt to go a bit more “mainstream” and simply highlight the featured attractions of the city.  Of course, I haven’t boiled it down to a “Top 10 Things To Do In Lucca” just yet.  I like to hear myself talk far too much!

Piazza del Giglio near our hotel
Piazza del Giglio near our hotel

During Medieval and Roman times, it was quite common to fortify entire cities behind massive protective walls.  Today, Lucca is a preeminent example of such fortification and one of the few cities left in Italy with her ancient walls fully intact.  It is a wonderful experience to drive your car through the same gate that was quite possibly used by Julius Caesar himself.  Of course, in this scenario,  I’m simply the chauffeur and my own little Julia is the royalty riding in the back of the chariot.  Even though I can’t positively date the existing walls as far back as Caesar, I can place him in Lucca for the well documented Lucca Conference, along with Pompey and Crassus in 56 BC.  The origin of the city itself date back as far as 180 BC.  Eventually Lucca rose in importance to the Roman empire and achieved immense wealth and status in the 11th century, thanks to the silk trade.  The result of this wealth is evident today; the city is very well maintained. Nearly every street features an ancient church boasting a façade clad with expensive marble.  Well designed piazzas are now the gathering places for tourists, street performers and restauranteurs.  Streets lined with charming shops and wonderful cafes full of patrons keep the vibe of the city humming well into the night.

Walls of Lucca
The ancient walls completely enclose the city
You can find many fine example of sculpture and statues along the top of the walls
You can find many fine examples of sculpture and statues along the top of the walls
The walls are wide enough for cars to pass along the top, but it is solely pedestrian
The walls are wide enough for cars to pass along the top, but it is solely pedestrian
Churches of Lucca
One of the many churches that can be found on nearly every corner in the city

Our reason for being in Lucca was to visit our good friend, Beth (although here she goes by, Elizabeth which is better understood in Italian). We had an amazing time when we stayed at her home in Tuscany last year, which I wrote about HERE and HERE.  She hosted us once again, but this time it was in the Bed & Breakfast she recently purchased, Le Violette.  The place matches her personality perfectly; warm and inviting with an extra pinch of charm.  I’ll write a full review of her B&B in an upcoming post.  After we unloaded our bags in the room, Beth started our tour of the city beginning with the walls, which were widened centuries ago.  In fact, not that long ago they used the walls for racing cars.  Today, they are purely pedestrian.

Lucca Walls
View of the main bell tower of Lucca from on top of the walls
Lucca Walls
We made our way to the walls several times throughout our trip
Lucca Walls
Julia wanted to walk on her own
Lucca Walls
Jen and Julia stop for a photo on the wall

We hopped off the walls and strolled through the city, enjoying Lucca as only a pedestrian can.

Via del Fosso has a canal running through the center
Via del Fosso has a canal running through the center
Via Cenami is one of the main shopping streets
Via Cenami is one of the main shopping streets
Beth helps Julia take a drink of water
Beth helps Julia take a drink of water
Piazza San Francesco
Julia takes a picture with me in Piazza San Francesco
The old market building where vendors would set up
The old market building where vendors would set up their stalls

Most Italian cities feature outdoor markets one-two times a week. We made our way to one of the fabulous Lucca mercato (market), which is held every Wednesday and Saturday.

Lucca Walls
Vendors set up for the market twice a week
We discovered that we accidentally strolled outside the walls by following the long line of vendors
We discovered that we accidentally strolled outside the walls by following the long line of vendors
Beautiful flowers are just one of the many things you could buy
Beautiful flowers are just one of the many things you could buy in the market
Lucca markets
I catch Jen for a photo in the market
Markets Italy Lucca
The markets can get crowded but they are a great place to pick up a picnic lunch

While in Lucca, you will want to position yourself in a vantage point that will command a view of the entire city, valley and mountains. You can choose to scale the Torre delle Ore (Clock Tower) or the Torre Guinigi (Guinigi Tower).  We opted for the later, because it is the only tower in the city that has trees planted on top.  But the ascent is not for the faint of heart; it’s a steep 230 steps until you get to the top. Compared to other similar towers, I found the €6 entry fee a bit steep, considering you don’t get anything other than the view (many similar sites also feature other historical items – this was purely just the tower).  I quickly reversed my position on the fee when I actually took in the view.  Breathtaking might be an appropriate word to describe the panorama.

Torre Guinigi steps
The final staircase ascending toward the top of the tower (shooting from below, looking up)
I lost my cool when I thought this was the top and I would have to view through a cage - when I cooled down, I realized there was a door and simply pushed on
I lost my cool when I thought this was the top and I would have to view the city through a cage.  When I calmed down, I realized there was a door and simply pushed on
View
View of the city with the prominent Cattedrale di San Martino in view
Lucca, Italy
More of the city and Torre dell Ore (clock tower)
View
Lucca is a beautiful city set with a backdrop of luscious green mountains
View
Panoramica da Torre Guinigi – I just noticed that almost this exact shot is in the Lucca city guide
Students in Lucca
I noticed a few groups of school children; Lucca is a popular destination for Italians

You will certainly want to pay a visit the Piazza dell’Anfiteatro, a Roman amphitheater that has been reconstructed into a piazza compete with charming shops and cafes.  We sat and enjoyed a few drinks while Julia enjoyed running around with Beth’s son, Indi.

Lucca Amphitheater
Panoramic of the Piazza inside the amphitheater
Lucca Amphitheater
Julia and Indi play inside the Piazza Anfiteatro
Lucca Amphitheater
Julia loves chasing pigeons!
Outside the Lucca Amphitheater you can see the remains of the original Roman structure
Outside the Lucca Amphitheater you can see the remains of the original Roman structure

Of course, no trip to Lucca would be complete without a visit to the Piazza San Michele and a tour through the Chiesa di San Michele in Foro.

Chiesa di San Michele
Chiesa (church) di San Michele
Chiesa di San Michele
The Romanesque architecture is clearly demonstrated in the façade, which was built in the 13th century
Chiesa di San Michele
The wealth of Lucca is demonstrated by their larger churches
Piazza San Michele
The piazza hosts some performers that loved playing American 90’s rock (primarily Nirvana)
Piazza San Michele
Julia can’t hear the words of Kurt Cobain without being moved to tip
Piazza
Jen and Julia in Piazza San Michele
Piazza
Julia pushes Beth’s son, Indi across the piazza
Piazza
Playing in the piazza
Chiesa di San Michele at night
Chiesa di San Michele at night

I hope you enjoyed our tour through Lucca together and consider adding it as your next Italian destination.  Below are a couple more pictures to temp you even further…

Buccellatio di Lucca
Buccellatio di Lucca is a typical bread that is eaten year round
Streets of Lucca
We constantly commented on how clean and well maintained the city is
Gelato in Lucca
Julia enjoys some gelato after dinner one night
“Come along for an upcoming post all about a couple restaurants in Lucca!”

Ci vediamo a presto (I’ll see you soon)!

Things Are Just a Little Different… Part IV

If you’ve been a loyal reader of this blog or have spent a little time playing around on the pages, you’ll see that I’ve started a “series” that highlights some of the differences between Italy and our native America.  Some of the differences are strange to us, many of them make perfect sense and others are just plain silly.  If you’d like to see where the series began, take a look back here:

Part I
Part II
Part III

Just like the previous editions, I will group these differences by category.  Without further adieu, Parte Quattro (Part Four)…

♠♣♥♦     ♠♣♥♦     ♠♣♥♦

CARS

The automotive industry in Italy is one of the major contributors to the country’s GDP.  The industry provides nearly a quarter million jobs and produces some of the world’s best cars.  But it’s not just Ferrari’s and Lamborghini’s on the roads here.  We have also learned a couple other things about the automobiles on the road.

Where are the trucks?  A Texan might have a harder time adjusting here than we did.  Finding a pickup truck is akin to finding the perfect blue-ribbon bull at the county fair (did I take the Texas thing too far?).  There are virtually no trucks on the road and I can count the number of large pickups I’ve seen on one hand.  If you do come across a pickup truck, there is a 90% chance that it is for work-purposes only.  No major commentary here, just an observation.

This little guy is about all the truck you're going to get around here
This little guy is about all the truck you’re going to get around here

You’d better not buy the Big Gulp!  At least not if you want to rest it in your car while you drive… most cars don’t have cup holders. This may seem strange to most Americans (certainly, there are times I miss my old car), but it’s not that crazy when you think about the culture here.  Italians drink small espresso’s at the bar (not 20oz Starbucks coffees) and I’ve never seen anyone over 15 years-old drink a soda.  McDonalds drive throughs are not a big thing and so there is really no major need for a cup holder.  And, oh yeah – a Big Gulp was never really a viable option, they don’t have 7-11‘s either.

“No cup holders? Well, where am I supposed to put this?”
No space for this adorable Coke (note the spelling of Julia)
No space for this adorable Coke (note the spelling of Julia)

Keep your eyes on the road.  I remember a couple years ago in America, I was driving with extreme caution because I was passing by a cop.  It turned out that it didn’t matter because he was not looking at me, but rather at the text message he was composing while cruising by at about 70mph.  If the police don’t pay much regard to “no texting while driving”, how can citizens take it seriously?  It’s completely different here – I mean, completely!  They don’t even HAVE  a “Don’t Text While Driving” campaign.  You know why?  EVERYONE KNOWS IT’S RIDICULOUS TO TEXT AND DRIVE!  Maybe it’s the narrow roads, maybe it’s the break-neck speed at which everyone drives, or maybe it’s just that people understand how dangerous it is.  In any event, it’s a relief to see.

You don't see texting and driving here in Italy
You don’t see texting and driving here in Italy

Make way for the VIP… motorcycle parking is right over here. Now, this is something I could get into when I move back home!  A lot of places have a designated area for motorcycle parking.  This is great, because cars don’t lose full parking spaces to something 1/3 of their size.  Obviously, it’s great for bikers who don’t have to spend time circling the lot.  Additionally, these motorcycle parking spaces are put to good use year round – bikes are out on the road from January 1st through December 31st; not just in the spring and summer.

Motorcyclists use their bikes year round
Motorcyclists use their bikes year round – she’s wearing a winter coat, gloves and pant warmer
That makes it easy to justify
Year-round motorcycle use makes it easy to justify “motorcycle parking”

A free pen?  Pen-shmen.  Give me something good!  Little freebies are appreciated in Italy, just like in America.  I tease my father in law, because if you open any of his drawers, you are likely to see dozens of TD Bank pens and Wells Fargo notepads (apparently, his banking loyalty goes only as far as their freebies).  It’s no different here, except for the free swag.  I recently got my car serviced and became the proud recipient of a bag of riso (rice).  Leave it to Italians to find a way to incorporate food into anything!

SHOPPING

Consumers in Italy shop for many regional goods; they have a strong preference for products made in their native land.  And who can blame them?  Italy is arguably the best place to buy clothes, food and many other products.  Certainly, we are taking advantage while we are here.

Are you happy with your product?  Good, because you had better be satisfied.  Don’t even think about returning it!  I’ve noted in the past that Italian businesses don’t offer nearly the same level of customer service that we’re accustomed to.  But if you want to see the worst they have to offer – just try to return a product.  You’ll get looked at like you just committed murder.  If by some miracle, their store policy actually allows for returns (the newer, big box stores will let you exchange merchandise for credit), a surly employee will demand a receipt before scrutinizing the merchandise as if your intention to swap out the original product for some inferior one as if you were Warner Bros exchanging Christian Bale for Ben Affleck.45555589

SALE!  SALE!  SALE!  Well, you’d better break out the credit card… this stuff is at a steep 30%-70% discount!  SALDI (sale) is the favorite sign of merchants all across the country.  It seems that there are always sales going on.  And you know what… they’ve got this guy hook…line…and sinker!  We love buying our stuff when it’s on sale, be it at the grocery store or the clothing store.

PROMOZIONE!  There is always a great sale going on in our grocery store
PROMOZIONE! There is always a great sale going on in our grocery store
But the BEST sales are when the wine is deeply discounted!
But the BEST sales are when the wine is deeply discounted!

What did I just hear?!  Did you just hear what you think you heard? Well, if what you think you heard was vulgar lyrics while shopping for bread in the grocery store, then you would be right.  Whether from a lack of understanding of English or a lack of censorship; it is not uncommon to hear Brittany Spears telling you to “turn this sh*t up!” when you’re walking through the Bennet (our grocery store).

“Please don’t hit me one more time!”

PETS

The pets here are more or less the same as back at home.  Most people prefer dogs and cats, but you have your occasional bird or even lizard depending on the personality of the owner.  I would suggest that there are certainly more farm animals that are considered “part of the family” though – Claudia (our aunt) grew up loving her prized cow (and one of her best friends).

We welcome you with open arms, Paris Hilton.  Back at home, only big celebrities can get away with bringing their pets anywhere they want.  Here, it’s normal to see dogs outside of the park and inside your favorite restaurant.  And I’m not just talking about “purse-dogs”.  I mean, full on German Shepard’s in grocery stores, restaurants, subways (the subterranean transport – not the sandwich shop) and museums.  Dogs really are that extra family member.

Jen and Fido checking out the sights from inside Jen's hair salon
Julia and someone’s dog checking out the sights from inside Jen’s hair salon

100 grams of pasta is the rule… no exceptions.  Cento grammi di pasta (100 grams of pasta) is the acceptable amount of pasta to eat (unless you’re having a secondo, in which case 80 grams is the way to go).  Italians can accurately grab that exact amount of pasta from the package without looking twice or using a scale.  So, if we’ve already determined that pets are really that extra family member – why should they be deprived of their daily pasta?  A lot of the dog food here is served in pasta form.  Buster knows the difference between  his fusilli and bocconcini cuts of pasta just as well as his owner, Giovanni.

Pasta Naturale for Fido
Pasta Naturale for Fido
Or perhaps her prefers pasta pre cotta with ortaggi
Or perhaps her prefers pasta pre cooked with ortaggi

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I’ve got even more to write, but then again… I’d like to stretch this series as long as the most perfect franchise ever, Police Academy (and I’m even talking about that seventh installment, the classic gem with a 3/10 rating Mission to Moscow).  See you next time…

Some Great… “Qsine” on the Celebrity Silhouette

If you’ve been a reader of this [travel] blog for sometime, I may have convinced you about the benefits of cruising.  You might even think that I’m lobbying for a job with one of the major cruise companies… and seeing as how I’ll need to resume gainful employment sooner rather than later, you may just be right.  If I haven’t yet convinced you to book your next vacation on a massive floating wonderland, let me quickly state my case once again.  Cruising offers you the opportunity to be pampered day and night while visiting far-off locales in multiple countries without unpacking more than once.  You can soak up culture, splurge on shopping, enjoy theatre, gamble in the casino, relax in the spa or simply sit in your room and enjoy room service while taking in the most magical of views.

Julia is no stranger to being pampered.  It scares me that two year old now hands me the phone and tells me to
Julia is no stranger to being pampered. It scares me that my two year old now hands me the phone and tells me to “order dinner”

On top of all that, you will enjoy delectable cuisine any time of day or night.  In my opinion (which, I’ve found is more fact than opinion since I’m right 98.8% of the time… just ask Jen), one of the best things about cruising is the food.  I once read that the weight gain for your average cruise-goer can be up to a pound a day (do the math for a two week cruise).  If the food can be the star of the show, truth be told – it can also be the downfall of your vacation if you’re served meals that are no better than bad banquet food (and you thought you had a lousy meal at Moritz Rosenstien’s bar mitzvah?).  That is why careful research about your cruise line (and more importantly, the specific cruise ship) is of the utmost importance.  We  chose our most recent Mediterranean cruise on one of Celebrity Cruises newest ships, the Silhouette based on the itinerary and overwhelmingly positive reviews of the food.  We were not disappointed.

“Tell me more, Dad. Give me the ins and outs of it all!”

It works like this; your per person cruise fare includes all the food in most of the ship’s restaurants.  It will not include alcohol or soda, but you can purchase these “extras” with a drink package or à la carte as you go.  Most ships have one or two main dining halls, where you can opt to eat your sit-down breakfast and dinner, paired at tables with other guests or by yourself (the choice is yours).  This is where you will have your “fixed” dining time for dinner, although it is entirely up to you if you want to show up.  Some cruise lines (Norwegian Cruise Lines) opt for a “freestyle” type of dining, so you just show up whenever you want.  Nowadays, even the “fixed” dining times are fairly flexible on most ships.  If you don’t want to slip out of your wife-beater and into a collared shirt, you’ll want to meander to the buffet on the upper level of the ship.  Here you can serve yourself breakfast, lunch and dinner from the vast array of options (anything from contemporary American to Indian).  At peak meal times you’d better have a “table-holder” and a “food-runner” who is not afraid to throw bows“; it does get crowded.  Don’t let any of those little old blue hairs fool you – they get serious about being next in line at the omelet station!  Finally, you’ll have another casual restaurant near the pool deck – a pizza and/or burger joint.  This is the basic formula for most cruise ships.  Beyond that, larger ships have a few extra “free” options and then their “specialty dining” options.

In the main dining room where, on the last night they featured a party to introduce the entire staff
In the main dining room where, on the last night they had a party to introduce the entire staff

The specialty dining restaurants usually range from $15/per person to $50/per person (not including gratuity).  We found that on our Holland America cruise last summer onboard the Nieuw Amsterdam, their specialty dining was a steal.  For $60 total (including tip), we ate at the Pinnacle Grill, a fabulous steak house – a meal that would easily approach $300 in any major city (that story is at the bottom of this post).  On our next cruise this past winter on board the Silhouette, our ship offered more dining options, but at more of a premium.  At $110+ per meal ($45/pp plus tip) we knew that we wouldn’t be able to enjoy all their fabulous specialty dining options – many of which feature James Beard chefs (Qsine, Blu, Murano, Tuscan Grill, Lawn Club, Bistro on Five and Bacio Gelateria).  We had to choose carefully among them… and I think we nailed it!

The chef's are like rock stars.  Here, our Executive Chef (Anthony R. Wilson) ascends through the stage floor like he's Mick Jagger
The chef’s are like rock stars. Here, our Executive Chef (Anthony R. Wilson) ascends through the stage floor like he’s Mick Jagger
Julia was quite literally knocked off her seat at the spectacle
Julia was quite literally knocked off her seat at the spectacle

Since this is not only a travel blog but also a food blog (identity crisis, much?), I have used this post to feature two of the “specialty dining” restaurants on the Silhouette.  This post is dedicated to two fabulous (is there a stronger word than fabulous?  If so… insert it please) meals that we enjoyed at Qsine and Murano.   I have included a description of each restaurant, copied directly from the company website.

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Qsine® offers a culinary journey that delivers elements of surprise and delight. Our James Beard featured Master Chef created Qsine to give you something you’ve never experienced before—on land or at sea. Leave any preconceived notions behind. Dig in and try new things. It’s time your palate got a wakeup call. Our iPad® menus make your dining experience even more fun and interactive.

“Popcorn” Fish n’ Chips – Boddingtons Battered Codfish & Chips, Malt Vinegar or Aioli
Sushi Lollipops - Nigiri Sushi, Soy Center, Wasabi Mayo & Pickled Ginger-Radish Salad
Sushi Lollipops – Nigiri Sushi, Soy Center, Wasabi Mayo & Pickled Ginger-Radish Salad
Disco Shrimp - Bouillon Poached Tiger Shrimp, Avocado, Tomato & Celery, with Cocktail Aioli and Crunchy Toppings
Disco Shrimp – Bouillon Poached Tiger Shrimp, Avocado, Tomato & Celery, with Cocktail Aioli and Crunchy Toppings
Lava Crab - Alaskan King Crab, Sweet Yellow Corn & Scallions, Kataifi with Old-Bay Lobster Sauce
Lava Crab – Alaskan King Crab, Sweet Yellow Corn & Scallions, Kataifi with Old-Bay Lobster Sauce
Lobster Escargot - Lobster & Escargot Fritters with Parsley-Garlic Butter Sauce
Lobster Escargot – Lobster & Escargot Fritters with Parsley-Garlic Butter Sauce
Slider Party - Grilled Angus Beef Patties, Aged Wisconsin Cheddar,
Slider Party – Grilled Angus Beef Patties, Aged Wisconsin Cheddar, “Qsine Slider Sauce”, Brioche Buns & Garnishes…
Taco
Taco “Royale” – Black Angus Sirloin Steak, Unordinary Tacos, Caramelized Onion-Poblano & Mortar Pestle Guacamole
Julia needed a chefs hat to properly mix the guacamole
Julia needed a chefs hat to properly mix the guacamole
Painter's Mignon - Filet Mignon with palatable pleasers
Painter’s Mignon – Filet Mignon with palatable pleasers
You can use the
You can use the “surprise” puzzle box to select your dessert
Or they'll just show up with candied lollipops to tease your senses
Or they’ll just show up with candied lollipops to tease your senses

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Impeccable service, classic design, world-class cuisine and comfortable sophistication are celebrated to the utmost in Murano. Experience tableside lobster presentation, an expansive selection of artisanal cheeses from around the world, or the extensive American and French wine list.

Charming and timeless, Murano transports you, through palate and décor, to a modern and sophisticated level of dining.

Jen and I are all aglow while attending an adult dinner without kids forks and sippy cups
Jen and I are all aglow while attending an adult dinner without kids forks and sippy cups
The lobster bisque had a wonderful table side presentation
The lobster bisque had a wonderful table side presentation
Creamy Maine Lobster Bisque - Leek and Shallot Flan, Cognac Cream, Crispy Sweet Yellow Corn Beignets
Creamy Maine Lobster Bisque – Leek and Shallot Flan, Cognac Cream, Crispy Sweet Yellow Corn Beignets
Pork Belly - Parsnip Purée, Caramelized Apples, Calvados Jus
Pork Belly – Parsnip Purée, Caramelized Apples, Calvados Jus
Warm Goat Cheese Soufflé - Smoked Tomato Coulis, Parmesan Cream, Basil Pesto
Warm Goat Cheese Soufflé – Smoked Tomato Coulis, Parmesan Cream, Basil Pesto
Smoked Salmon & Peekytoe Crab Parfait - Layered with Avocado, Salmon Caviar, Crème Fraîche, Petite Greens
Smoked Salmon & Peekytoe Crab Parfait – Layered with Avocado, Salmon Caviar, Crème Fraîche, Petite Greens
Jen's lobster was prepared table side - this poor guy almost never left the side of our table with all of his various preparations
Jen’s lobster was prepared table side – this poor guy almost never left the side of our table with all of his various preparations
Some of the ingredients mixed in to her lobster dish
Some of the ingredients mixed in to her lobster dish
Greg's Herb Crusted Lamb Rack - Pea Purée, Tomato Confit, Baby Carrots, Spice Meatball, Garlic Jus
Greg’s Herb Crusted Lamb Rack – Pea Purée, Tomato Confit, Baby Carrots, Spice Meatball, Garlic Jus
Jen's Murano Lobster - Cognac Flambéed Warm Water Lobster Tail, Fresh Basil, Applewood Smoked Bacon, Dijon-Cream
Jen’s Murano Lobster – Cognac Flambéed Warm Water Lobster Tail, Fresh Basil, Applewood Smoked Bacon, Dijon-Cream
A Fine Selection of Artisan Cheeses served with Pain de Campagne and Dry Fruits
A Fine Selection of Artisan Cheeses served with Pain de Campagne and Dry Fruits
My cheese plate
My cheese plate
WOW!
WOW!
Caramel and White Coffee Ice Cream, Dolce, Far Niente, Napa Valley
Caramel and White Coffee Ice Cream, Dolce, Far Niente, Napa Valley
Grand Marnier Soufflé Crème Anglaise á la Gousse Tahitienne
Grand Marnier Soufflé – Crème Anglaise á la Gousse Tahitienne
Crepe with fresh fruit topping prepared table side
Crêpe with fresh fruit topping prepared table side

We were drawn in by the fun food-play in Qsine and the ability to order our meal on iPads.  The food and ambiance did not disappoint. We thoroughly enjoyed our meal at Murano because we had a built in surprise.  My parents wanted to give Jen this meal for her birthday and even included four hours of “in-room” babysitting for Julia, which was even sweeter than the restaurant’s jaw dropping desserts.  And in case you were counting, yes – that was four appetizers and three desserts in Murano (and countless dishes in Qsine).  I mean, once you pay the price of admission… it’s all included, after all!

I hope you enjoyed taking another culinary voyage with me (this time on the high seas).  I hope your taste buds were satisfied.  Tune back in soon when we conclude our cruise with visits to Montenegro, Croatia, Sicily and Naples.  Ciao tutti!

Let’s Set Sail Together Again (Corfu, Greece)!

It’s been nearly a month and a half since my last meaningful post and I am once again faced with the monumental task of getting caught back up.  I’m not sure how or why I allowed myself to get so far behind, but I do know that I have left myself a lot of work.  The wine, cheese and salami will just have to wait (well, I suppose it can’t hurt to have a little wine while I write).  I would like to apologize to my readers for this delay and I would like to acknowledge one loyal reader in particular;  Helen  actually reached out to me through our Contact Us page and basically said, “what the hell, Greg – where’ve you been?!”  Helen and everyone – even though it can’t excuse the lack of content, we  just got back from a two-week trip to the States where, in my capacity as Best Man, I roasted my good buddy Josh and toasted his beautiful bride, Abby (read about Josh and Abby’s trip to visit us here and here).

While we were home, I rediscovered some magical things – burritos, quality customer service and Netflix.  We haven’t watched as much TV over the past year as we did over the past two weeks.  I became obsessed with the Netflix original series, House of Cards – an amazing drama starring, Kevin Spacey as Frank Underwood, a cagey and politically ambitious congressman who is constantly scheming and conniving to reach the next rung of the political ladder.  If Frank Underwood can work through all hours of the night and stay ten moves ahead of his opposition, surely I can bang out a few extra blog posts in the next couple weeks.

You and me both, Frank
You and me both, Frank

We still have tons of travel left to do together – I’ve only written about the very first part of our cruise late last year and so much has happened since.  So put on your boating shoes and let’s get going…

Here we go again!
Here we go again!

When I last left you, we had already visited Rome (here and here) before hitting the Mediterranean Sea for Florence.  We spent the next day at sea (which means there is no port and therefore no disembarking the ship), which can often be my favorite time onboard a cruise ship.  We tend to pick our cruises based on the ports of call, but I always like to be sure there are two or three sea days allotted in the itinerary.  It may sound crazy – but it’s nice to have a day to relax in the middle of it all.  Carrying a toddler, stroller, backpack (and sometimes even a wife) across miles and miles of city streets, on and off tour buses and in and out of museums [while rewarding] is a lot of work.  To have a day where you cannot do anything other than enjoy your ship’s amenities is a pretty sweet prospect.  That, and I like to gamble – sea day’s are the only time you can sit in the casino all day (or as long as your wife can tolerate being left alone with your child).

A dormant volcano visible from the ship while we sailed past Sicily
A dormant volcano visible from the ship while we sailed past Sicily
Apparently, gambling is a part of our blood line - Julia enjoys the Casino as much as I do
Apparently, gambling is a part of our blood line – Julia enjoys the Casino as much as I do
First she hit the slots
First she hit the slots
Next, she discovered the blackjack tables - that is definitely my little girl
Next, she discovered the blackjack tables – that is definitely my little girl

The first sea day was also the first “formal night” and so we all three enjoyed an opportunity to get dressed up and go to dinner.  I was up a little after a hard day playing blackjack and so I was in high spirits. The delicious prime rib they served helped to keep me and my tummy happy (they even brought it out “bloody and still mooing with a mountain of horseradish”, just like I asked) .  After dinner, we took in a very enjoyable show and went to bed content with a day of doing… well, not much of anything.

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Ready for a fun “night on the town”
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Julia let me take her for a spin on the dance floor before dinner
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Julia and Jen at dinner

The next day we woke up at port in Corfu, Greece.  It was drizzling and we had a long day at port in a relatively small city, so we decided we would try to wait out the rain on the ship.  We spent the morning participating in some of the cheesy activities organized by the ship’s Cruise Director (imagine a business team building activity).  It would have been an uneventful morning if it had not been for a strengthening bond between two little girls who would quickly be known as the fastest of friends onboard Celebrity’s Silhouette.  Ava had met Julia in one of the cafe’s the day before and  she didn’t hesitate to chat her up on either occasion.  She was likely craving companionship of someone close to her own age (Ava is about a year older).  The two instantly clicked and after the game, they spent some time dancing, playing and “conversing” (if you can consider each girl stating her independent and random observations a conversation).

We meandered about the ship while we waited for the clouds to disperse
We meandered about the ship while we waited for the clouds to disperse
Ava found a new friend in Julia and Julia discovered her new hero
Ava found a new friend in Julia and Julia discovered her new hero

As the girls played, we spent some time getting to know Ava’s parents, Catherine and Jim without realizing that we were making fast friends of our own.  After just a few minutes talking with Cat and Jim, we learned that they have a close-knit family too – they were cruising with Jim’s brother, “Uncle” Mike and his wife, Feng  as well as the boy’s parents – Bob and Dorothy.  The entire family was very pleasant and even though we didn’t realize it at the time, we were forming a relationship with a big family we would “adopt” as our own for the remainder of the cruise.  Eventually, the rain let up and we took our leave for Corfu.

A panoramic of Corfu, Greece
A panoramic of Corfu, Greece

Corfu is a Greek Island dating back to 1300 BC when it was first inhabited by the Phaeacians.  The history of the island is a story penned by bloody battles and conquests.  This is evidenced by the two fortresses that enclose the capital city; two formidable structures standing as pillars of protection against would-be invaders from the sea .  Jen and I decided that we were up for a walk and so we strolled from the ship, past the “New” Fortress (Νέο Φρούριο) and into the downtown area.  We meandered past ancient churches and charming shops and restaurants when heard a tiny, little voice scream, “Juila”!  It was her new friend Ava, who came barreling up and generously gave Julia a big hug and a piece of her bread.  We kept hiking past the outskirts of town and into the Old Fortress (Παλαιό Φρούριο) – a citadel that offers the most magnificent panoramic of the ancient city, justifiably deemed a  UNESCO World Heritage Site.

Strolling through the city streets and taking in the shops
Strolling through the city streets and taking in the shops
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The city streets of ancient Corfu are full of charm
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We walked past beautiful churches
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We came across Ava eating lunch with her family
Old Fortress (Παλαιό Φρούριο)
Old Fortress (Παλαιό Φρούριο)
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The Old Fortress and church that was built on the grounds for the soldiers
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Crossing the drawbridge toward the Old Fortress
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The church and Old Fortress high atop the rocks
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Jen and Julia stroll across a desolate stretch on their way toward the church
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A view of the sea from the fortress walls
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Jen and Julia take in the view
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From the top of the cliff, we had a great view of the city and our ship
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Julia sits along a fortress wall with Corfu in the background
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She gives me a big hug
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Jen wanted to get in on that action

After a pleasant and rewarding day, we concluded our self-guided tour when we missed the last bus back to the ship, thereby closing the loop on our long walk by hustling back to the ship on foot.  We were just moments away from getting back on a course of exploration throughout eastern Europe, just as I am back on track  blogging.  For any other HOC (House of Cards) fans out there, imagine me concluding this post with two quick raps of my class ring on the desk.  Frank Underwood would be proud!

Sipping Espresso Turns One!

[OR SIPPING ESPRESSO BY THE NUMBERS]

Wow!  We did it!  SIPPING ESPRESSO officially turns one today.  I distinctly remember starting our blog one year ago today.  Jen had the idea to use a blog in order to maintain a “virtual journal” of our time in Italy.  She also wanted a vessel to share our photos and stories with family and friends.  I was intrigued by the idea of maintaining some sort of project and so I was happy to jump into the blogosphere.  Over the past year that we have been posting – our tiny, insignificant blog has grown into something much, much more…a little, insignificant blog.
Grover Helps Us Celebrate

Over the summer, we took a cruise that concluded with a goodbye letter from the captain, along with “fun facts” about our time at sea.  For example, they listed the number of crew on board, the amount of food consumed in terms of weight, our nautical miles traveled, etc.  It gave me the idea that it may be fun to also look back at our own blogging voyage and break down the numbers from this past year.

So without further adieu… here you go.

Sipping Espresso by The Numbers

Number of Blog Posts
87 (including this one)

I couldn’t make it to the even 100 – even though I have a few half-written posts in the pipeline. Sometimes all I feel like I’m doing is sitting in front of my computer… blogging!

Total Number of Page Views
25,955

I was shocked and awed by the number of people that have visited our blog.  Thanks, mom and dad for clicking on the blog 25,645 times and getting your friends to click on the links the remaining 310 times.

Most Unique Countries That Have Visited the Blog
Ukraine (we’re huge with the Ukrainian crowd), Russia, China, Japan, Korea and Australia.  We also have a good amount of visits from our European neighbors  – France, Spain, Norway, Germany and Denmark.  Of course, our biggest base is still the good ‘ol U.S. of A.

Post With The Most Page Views
The View Overtop Como (link) – 1,114 page views

I was really surprised by this.  It’s definitely not one of the better posts or subject matters.  I think it must have some combination of key words that rank it fairly high in google searches about Lake Como.

Greg’s Favorite Posts
Scotland – Where Real Men Wear Skirts (link)
Kiss me, I’m Irish in Dublin (link)
I’ll Take a Pint of the Black Stuff, Gov’na (link)
Recreating a Photo 63 Years Later (link)

This was a tough one for me.  It’s like choosing among your children.  OK, that’s not true at all – it was much easier than that.  I liked these particular posts because I had such fond memories of the events, there was usually a good combination of food/travel/photography in the story and there was most likely a quip or joke I made that I still find to be particularly witty today.

Jen’s Favorite Posts
Beaches, Wine and Pasta Making – What a Vacation (link)
Make My Order of Haggis a Double, Please (link)
Recreating a Photo 63 Years Later (link)
Five Villages – One Day (link)
Our Final Days at Sea (link)
Oktoberfest…What More Can I Say?! (link)

Revenue Earned Through Blogging
$0

Well, I guess I won’t be making a profession out of this anytime soon.Blogging Doesn't Pay The Bills

Our Time Abroad… In a Nutshell

Number of Visitors
23

We have had the good fortunate to have shared many of our adventures with friends and family. Here are the people that came to see us.

Diane (2 visits), Dominic, Jessica, S David (2 visits), Deborah (2 visits), Nathan, Danielle, Michelle, David, Elsa, Giovanni, Sonny, Stefani, Lauren, Josh, Abby, Dave, Jill, Matt and Lindsey.

Average Days in Between Visitors
5.9 days*

When you have that many visitors in a short period of time, it doesn’t give you a lot of time to change the sheets.  To our guests… I promise, they were changed (wink, wink).

*This average was taken from the last day of our first visitor and the first day of our last visitor.

Total Amount of Euros Spent on Traffic Violations
€1,710.78 ($2,318.44)

UGHHH!  That’s a lot of cannoli’s!  This wonderful figure includes the fines themselves as well as the “convenience fee” our local government charges in order to pay the ticket, the mailing fee I have to pay to receive the ticket and the commission I have to pay to use a credit card.  I may not be paying taxes in Italy, but I’ve sure given more than my fair share.

Breakdown of tickets
•Speeding – €1,369.48
•Limited Zone – €288.80
•Parking – €52.50Pull Over

Approximate Grams of Pasta Consumed
44,200 grams (97.44 lbs of pasta)

This [somewhat shocking] math was fairly simple.  An average serving of pasta is 80 grams per person (although, I usually have a little more).

2 people (Greg and Jen) eating pasta 4x week = 640 grams per week
+1 child (Julia) eats a third portion = 210 grams per week 
Total of 850 grams per week

850 grams x 52 weeks = 44,200 grams of pasta

I’d venture to guess it’s a little more than this (let’s call it a ‘cool’ 100 pounds of pasta).  Wow… that’s gross when you add it all up!

Approximate Number of Pizza’s Eaten
208 pizzas

Pizza in Italy is thin and served in individual portions.  So if we both want pizza, we will order two pies.  Not only is pizza delicious – it’s quick, mess-free and simple when you’re on the road.  You can always find a good pizza place anywhere in Italy.  Apart from that, we discovered an amazing brand of frozen pizza that we enjoy probably once a week (Jen cooks amazing lunches, we’re usually more low-key for dinner).

This was also simple math.
4 pizzas per week x 52 weeks = 208 pizzas

I actually think my average my be higher, but I don’t want to embarrass myself any further.Pizza Image

European Countries Visited 
13

Traveling as much as possible was always a major goal in moving here.  Over the past year we have seen Italy, France, Germany, Austria, Vatican City, Greece, Turkey, Montenegro, Croatia, Switzerland, Scotland, Ireland and Monaco.

Regions Visited Within Italy
11

There are 20 regions in Italy, each of them remarkable in their own way.  Every region could make their own argument for having the tastiest food, producing the best wine, boasting the most magical scenery and on and on.  Truthfully, your opinion may be swayed in favor of the region making it’s case… until you visit another region and have to decide all over again.  Seeing each of Italy’s 20 diverse regions is an important part of our experience here.  Even though we may only be able to get a “flavor” of the local place, we’d like to see them all.  We’ve just tipped past the half-way point and we’ve got our fingers crossed that we’ll be able to see all 20.

We have visited:

Lombardia (Lombardy)
Piemonte (Piedmont)
Liguria
Trentino Alto-Adige
Veneto
Emilia Romagna
Toscana (Tuscany)
Lazio
Abruzzo
Campania
Sicilia (Sicily)

UNESCO World Heritage Sites Visited
21

World Heritage Sites are places that have been listed by UNESCO as possessing important cultural significance.  They all share one thing in common – they are beautiful and awe-inspiring.  Viewing these magical sites has been a highlight of our time abroad and a blessing that only Europe can offer in such abundance.UNESCO Logo

Italy
Cathedral, Torre Civica and Piazza Grande, Modena
City of Verona
Historic Centre of Florence
Historic Centre of Naples
Historic Centre of Rome
Historic Centre of San Gimignano
Historic Centre of Siena
Late Baroque Towns of the Val di Noto
Portovenere, Cinque Terre, and the Islands
Venice and its Lagoon
The Dolomites

France
Pont du Gard (Roman Aqueduct)

Austria
Historic Centre of the City of Salzburg

Greece
Acropolis, Athens
Archaeological Site of Olympia
Old Town of Corfu

Turkey
Historic Areas of Istanbul

Montenegro
Natural and Culturo-Historical Region of Kotor

Croatia
Old City of Dubrovnik

Switzerland
Swiss Alps Jungfrau-Aletsch

Scotland
Old and New Towns of Edinburgh

Number of Grappa Bottles Acquired
26

We have acquired (and drank) more grappa in our first month here than either of us had consumed in our lifetimes.  It’s just how it is… we love it!  Plus, we love making our guests try grappa to gauge their reactions.  These 26 bottles have either been purchased, received as gifts or made at home.

Number of Grappas Made at Home
2

It’s surprisingly easy.  If you’d like to try, click HERE

“Strange” Foods Tried by Julia
Julia is quite the adventurous eater.  She’s always happy to eat off our plates and we are happy to expose her to new things.  Among the dishes she’s tried this year are:

Foie gras (goose liver), caviar, pigeon, pâté, haggis (heart, liver and lungs encased in a sheep’s stomach), black pudding (mixture of pork fat, onion, oatmeal and pig’s blood), goat, rabbit, lamb, boar, octopus, squid, freshly shaved truffles, lardo (cured pork fat), fondue, mussels, king prawns and lobster.

These were the only facts and and figures that I had the foresight to include or the smarts to calculate.  If I’ve left anything out, please let me know!  I look forward to Sipping Espresso making it another year and entering our “terrible two’s”.  Thanks for coming along on this voyage with us!

10 Signs That Confirm You’ve Gone “Full Italian”

Robert Downey Jr. will be the first to tell you that you never go full Italian.  But if you’re planning on living in Italy for more than a few months… the chances of going “full Italian” are pretty strong.  Truly being an Italian is rooted deeper than the country in which you live or the ancestors to which you are tied.   Being Italian is a state of mind.  It will affect the way you think, the way you eat and the way you love.  Did I mention that it will affect the way you eat?
If you’re unsure whether or not you’ve gone “full Italian” – here is a list of telltale signs.  The longer you live in Italy, the more susceptible you are to each and every point.  If you’re happy with the changes (perhaps the improved fashion sense and appreciation of wine) – stroll in to your favorite enoteca and plan to stay a little longer.  However, if the changes scare you (perhaps the increased volume at which you speak or your daily critique of the food you’re eating) – well then, hop on the first olive oil freighter and high-tail it home (there’s one leaving now… there’s another one… and another one…).

1. YOUR HAND WORKS IN CONJUNCION WITH YOUR MOUTH
This is probably the first visible transformation as you begin to morph into a full Italian.  When you consistently discover your thumb meeting your other four fingers as if you’re tenderly cupping a tiny quail egg… and then shake it vigorously up and down like you intend to scramble it inside the shell – you’re starting to look a lot like a local.  Italians are very expressive and use their hands to illustrate their points.  Apart from hand gestures working in harmony with your words, speaking with just your hands is a language unto itself.  The same gesture can mean, “he’s always late”, “that’s expensive”, “that’s inexpensive”, “stop busting my chops”… and much, much more.
2. IT’S SEVENTY DEGREES AND SUNNY BUT YOU’RE WEARING A SCARF
OK, it’s seventy and sunny – but is it November?  Oh, well in that case – you’d better have your scarf on.  And a hat and a heavy coat and two layers beneath it and don’t forget the gloves, just in case.  You did say it was November, right?  Italians dress for the season – not the weather.  This means that no matter what the weather brings – you can always tell who is Italian and who is just visiting.  I turned every head in my grocery store when we first moved here by shopping for toilet paper wearing shorts and flip flops… in February.
Scarf… check.  Hat…check.  Gloves…check.  Big puffy coat…check.
“Mom, am I supposed to be sweating this much?”
3. YOU CAN SET YOUR WATCH TO YOUR STOMACH
The time lunch starts deviates slightly throughout the country – people eat earlier in the north than they do in the south, but one thing never changes.  You eat at the exact same time as everyone else in your region, every… single…day.  This means planning an entire day around lunch.  Shops are closed for lunch, parks are emptied for lunch – basically the country shuts down until lunch is over.  You can’t schedule a visit to another city unless the timing of that visit works with your lunch plans.  Once accustomed to the dietary habits of your region, don’t deviate from the script or your stomach will start kicking harder than, Dominic the Christmas Donkey.

“I’m hungry… let’s get some lunch!”

4. IT’S TIME FOR COFFEE… AGAIN

I don’t mean the Starbucks 20 oz coffee that gets you through the morning drive.  I mean an espresso – quickly and skillfully delivered by a barista that will make a thousand more in the same day.  You can drink your coffee at the bar or at the table, with a little milk or without – but you’re virtually required to have more than one.  You’ll need your coffee with biscotti(breakfast cookies) in the morning, a mid-morning coffee, another immediately after lunch, an afternoon cafe and possibly one after dinner.  And that’s if you’re conservative – we have friends and family that drink as many as a dozen espressos’ in a day.  The Italians didn’t invent coffee – but they elevated drinking it into a form of art.

“15 espresso’s a day multiplied by 7 days a week divided by 24 hours in a day times 31 days in a month…
forget it!  Bring me another coffee!!”
5. YOU SERVE BREAD WITH EVERY MEAL
This was a great mystery to me.  There is always bread served with every meal, but no one ever seemed to eat it (you don’t eat it withyour pasta and by the time your secondohas arrived, it’s too late).  Magically, the bread always disappears and yet everyone in the country remains skinny.  I thought there must be an overweight fatina dei pane (bread fairy) flying across tabletops with an insatiable appetite for baked goods.  What I learned is that Italians eat the bread in moderation and at specific points in the meal (as a conduit for sugo, for example).  When you can skillfully (and secretly) devour the appropriate portion of bread – you have mastered one of the finest and least-known Italian skills.
Keep an eye out for the Italian Bread Fairy to help you eat your bread
6. YOU CAN FIND THE COUNTERPOINT IN ANY DISCUSSION
You know that you’ve gone full Italian the moment you voluntarily enter into the arena of Italy’s most popular sport – discussing politics.  Once you start cutting and slicing across your political talking points like a young Barry Sanders dancing across the Silverdome, you’ve reached the Champion’s League of your Italian-ness.  A less challenging, but still very “Italian” way of thinking is to engage in a conversation at argument-level volume by simply disagreeing.  Or better yet – agreeing, but doing it so loudly that non-Italian passerby’s surely think you are involved in a spate with a mortal enemy… not a good friend.
Bonus points if you can use an Italian soccer play in your analogy as opposed to American Football player.
“Heyyy, I told you I wanted a BIG salami”
“I told YOU, that WAS a big salami!”
7. YOU WILL LITERALLY GIVE THE SHIRT OFF YOUR BACK
Living in Italy is good for your soul – especially when it alters how you treat other people.  It is impossible not to let the infectious Italian generosity and hospitality seep into your persona.  Embrace the change and soon you’ll find yourself at the airport at 1:30am – picking up a cousin’s friend that his girlfriend met in college six years ago.  But you’ll be glad that you can be the one to help and you’ll surely get rewarded for your efforts somewhere down the line.  When you’re willing to give someone in need the shirt of your back – even if it’s Armani; you are on your way to full Italian.
“Here, take mine.  I’ll get another one”
8. YOU ACCELERATE WHEN YOU SHOULD BRAKE
Everything you’ve seen, heard or read about Italian drivers is true.  Little old ladies whisk past at 140 km per hour.  Motorcycles weave dangerously into oncoming traffic.  When you can safely and comfortably join the challenging dance that is played out on the winding Italian roads each day – you’ve become a native.  Bonus points for any guy that can drive a Fiat 500 and still look like a typical Italian ladies man.
“Vai!  Vai!  Let’s go!  Move it, buddy!”
9. YOUR FAVORITE PAIR OF SKINNY JEANS MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A 90’s RAPPER
When you first moved to Italy, it’s highly likely that you bought some nice clothes so that you didn’t stick out too badly.  You probably bought an expensive pair of jeans and even purchased a cut that is skinnier that you’re used to.  Once you’ve lived in Italy long enough, you’ll think that “skinny” cut is so baggy you are not sure how you ever dared don those parachute pants in public (and that accounts for the extra 10 pasta pounds you’re sure to have gained).  Italians wear their clothes very fitted, very tailored and very well.  You’ll also discover that your fashion tastes in general have changed – a puffy winter coat?  How could you have ever lived without one?!
Julia wouldn’t be caught dead without her puffy coat and skinny jeans
10. YOU THINK YOU’RE BERLUSCONI WHEN YOU PARK YOUR CAR
Italians drive fast and they drive aggressively.  Parking is no different – forget circling around the block, looking for a spot.  You can comfortably double or triple park your car and then casually stroll into your favorite coffee bar for an espresso.  Airport run?  Throw your parking brake on and walk in to wait for your arrival.  It’s always amazing that everyone is so comfortable leaving his or her car parked illegally.  If they do actually get a ticket – the issuing officer better not be nearby, lest they get an earful about having the audacity to ticket such a law-abiding citizen.  When you can leave your car in the middle of a busy intersection with less stress than boiling an egg – you’ve definitely gone… full Italian.
“What sign?!  I never saw a sign!”

So there you have it – ten telltale signs that you’ve “gone full Italian”.  Have you developed some or all of these habits (whether intentional or not)?  If the answer is “yes” – then pull out the grappa and make sure your meal is properly digested… you are an Italian.  If not, stay a little longer – it’s only a matter of time.

All I Want For Christmas is a White Lamborghini

You can have your two front teeth – I’ll take the Lamborghini!

Oh yeah, that’s the one I want!

Periodically, my father-in-law will send me Italian Groupon deals that he thinks we may be interested in acquiring.  Through this site, we have found good deals on restaurants and hotels.  Just like Groupon or Living Social at home – some of the deals are interesting, others are not.  Some are phenomenal values – others are just cleverly packaged marketing schemes.  Recently, he sent me one item that had the hairs on the back of my neck standing tall.  The opportunity to take a Ferrari and/or Lamborghini out on a race track and really “open’er up!”

I wouldn’t call myself a true “car enthusiast” – but I am definitely a guy who loves his vehicles.  I’ve had the pleasure of owning a few very fast cars and I have relished driving them.  My favorite toy (Harley Davidson VRSC Nightrod Special) is sitting under cover at my parent’s house back at home. I love fine automobiles and have a propensity toward German vehicles.  However, when it comes to the worlds best super-cars… nothing can rival an Italian made vehicle.  Ferrari, Lamborghini and Maserati are the “dream cars” for every little boy (both here in Italy and around the world).  So it was no wonder that the little boy that still lives inside me was doing cartwheels over this particular Groupon deal.  Jen agreed that this was as good a gift as any – an early Christmas present for the bigger of her two kids.

Julia stands with me before I get all set to drive the Lamborghini
Jen and Julia in front of the racetrack

So on a recent cold December morning, we set our GPS toward the small town of Chignolo Po – home to the Circuito Internazionale Le Colline.  I had elected to purchase a package of 6 laps.  I chose this particular racetrack because of its substantial length and perilous turns.  I also chose the option to divide my 6 laps between two different Ferrari’s and a Lamborghini that this race track held in it’s fleet.  Having raced my own cars on a track before – I was beyond the limit of human excitement to do it all over again in some of the world’s most exclusive and powerful vehicles.

If you have been reading about our road trips over this past year, you’ll know that we are almost always late getting out the door.  Not this time!  I had a 10:30 start time and nothing was going to make me late.  Except traffic.  A heavy, inordinate amount of traffic.  The traffic devoured the extra hour I had budgeted for myself.  Then we arrived in the wrong city – the address on the website was wrong and we had driven roughly 30 minutes out of the way.  After almost 2.5 hours in the car, we finally crossed the gates of Le Colline and I rushed up before my spot was lost.  It did take some convincing on my part for them to let me race (they had already moved on to the next grouping of participants).  Fortunately for me, my skills in Italian arguing and hand gestures have come a long way over the past year.

I was beyond giddy as I crossed under this banner

The young lady organizing the races asked me if I wanted to drive a Ferrari or a Lamborghini.  I told her that I wanted to drive both, but she told me I could only choose one.  I thought the miscommunication was due to my tardiness and so I opted for the Lamborghini.  Six laps in that monster would suit me just fine.  But then she told me that the first two laps would be in a Porsche Cayenne.  I protested, but quickly relented as she gave me a gesture like, “I did you a favor to squeeze you in.”  So I walked over to the Porsche SUV.  Then I realized I wouldn’t be alone.  And I wouldn’t be driving!  I was shown into the back seat, alongside two other participants.  One of the track employees was behind the wheel.  Jen later told me that my face was so obviously full of disappointment and frustration that she thought I might hurt someone or myself.

We set out in the Cayenne – there I am in the backseat!
That’s us “burning” up the racetrack… I’m still in the backseat

I remained optimistic that the two laps in the back seat were just a tutorial – an opportunity to learn the turns and nuances of the track.  I sat in the backseat, bored and un-entertained while the other passengers proclaimed their excitement about being on a racetrack alongside Ferraris and a Lamborghini.  Meanwhile, I just wanted to drive them!  When we pulled back to the start, it became obvious that the first two of six laps had just expired in the back of a not-so-special SUV.  OK, well… I still had four laps left and the confidence that I could convince the lady to divide them among both a Ferrari and a Lamborghini.

By the time we pulled back to the start it was obvious I had just burned two of my six laps

Almost immediately after I got back as a passenger, my name was called to be a driver.  I marched toward the Lamborghini and eagerly got behind the wheel.  After a brief explanation in a mixture of Italian and English – I put the pedal to the floor and took off.  I quickly got a feel for the track and even passed one of the Ferraris.  My instructor gave me an extra boost of confidence in my driving ability with many, “bravos” and “perfectos.”

I’m about to drive a dream car…
Here I go…
And there I GO!

If my face before these two laps was full of frustration and disappointment, I’m sure that my face after those two laps was the polar opposite – I couldn’t hide the smile that stretched from ear to ear. That is, until I asked about the car for my final two laps.  The young lady explained that I didn’t get any more laps.  My companion (Jen) could opt to take the final two laps in the Porsche SUV as I had done previously, or I could opt to take that same ride again.  I couldn’t believe it.  We did not give up without a fight and made her pull out the paperwork to show us the fine print.  Sure enough, it was there.  Six laps somehow watered down to two laps.  Three super cars had somehow boiled down to one.  To add insult to injury, she presented me with a “diploma” before I had the chance to storm away.

Getting out of the car, you couldn’t wipe the smile off my face
Julia gives her favorite GT driver a big hug
I “proudly” display my diploma
Here it is… my diploma!
I wasn’t the only one that got to race fast cars

In cases like this – there’s nothing more you can do than laugh.  So that’s exactly what we did.  Plus, I was still happy that I actually got to race a Lamborghini – something that I had always dreamed of doing.  So what if it was took four hours in the car to race for roughly 6 minutes?!  I had 6 minutes of fun and exhilaration and we got a funny story.  One thing is for sure – I’ll be certain to read the fine print of any future Groupon deals.

Merry Christmas to me!